What is Power & Control?

Deliberate use of emotional, physical, financial, and psychological tactics by abusers to manipulate, intimidate, and exert dominance over their victims, undermining their autonomy.

Understanding Power and Control Dynamics in Domestic Abuse: A Guide for Survivors


In the journey of healing and empowerment, recognizing the dynamics of power and control in abusive relationships is a critical step for survivors. Domestic abuse, often misconceived as solely physical violence, encompasses a broader spectrum of manipulative tactics aimed at exerting dominance over a partner. This article aims to elucidate the concept of power and control in domestic abuse, offering insights for survivors to identify and understand the mechanisms their abusers used to maintain control.


The Essence of Power and Control:


Power and control in domestic abuse manifest through behaviors and strategies an abuser employs to assert dominance over their victim. This control is not just about physical constraints but extends to emotional, psychological, financial, and sexual realms of a relationship. The core aim is to strip the survivor of their autonomy, self-worth, and ability to make independent decisions, so the abuser maintains privileges at the survivor's expense.


Recognizing the Signs: The Power and Control Wheel:


The Power and Control Wheel, developed by the Domestic Abuse Intervention Programs (DAIP), serves as a comprehensive tool to identify and understand the various tactics used by abusers. It categorizes the insidious forms of abuse into distinct patterns:


  1. Coercion and Threats: Using threats or coercion to instill fear and compliance. This could range from threats of physical harm to threats of self-harm or other manipulative tactics to control the survivor's actions.


  1. Intimidation: Employing actions, gestures, or expressions to intimidate, such as damaging property, displaying weapons, or any act that makes the survivor feel unsafe and subjugated.


  1. Emotional Abuse: This involves undermining the survivor's sense of self-worth through insults, humiliation, constant criticism, or making them feel they are mentally unstable.


  1. Isolation: Restricting the survivor's freedom, including social isolation from friends and family, monitoring movements, and controlling access to information or assistance.


  1. Minimizing, Denying, and Blaming: Denying the abuse, minimizing the survivor's experiences, or shifting the blame onto the survivor, making them question their reality and feel responsible for the abuse.


  1. Using Children: Manipulating children as a means of exerting control, including using them to relay messages or threatening to take them away to hurt the survivor.


  1. Economic Abuse: Controlling finances to make the survivor financially dependent. This includes withholding money, restricting access to bank accounts, or preventing the survivor from working.


  1. Asserting Privilege: Abusing societal norms and roles to justify control and treatment of the survivor, often seen through dictating household roles and decisions to the detriment of the survivor's independence.


The Path Forward:


Understanding the power and control dynamics is pivotal for survivors in their healing process. Recognizing these patterns is not just about identifying past abuses but also about empowering survivors to reclaim their autonomy and make informed decisions about their future.


Support and Resources:


For survivors, knowing there is support and resources available can be a beacon of hope. Organizations dedicated to aiding survivors of domestic abuse offer counseling, legal assistance, and support groups designed to empower and assist in recovery.


The road to recovery from domestic abuse is a journey of reclaiming power and control over one’s own life. Recognizing the tactics of manipulation and control used by an abuser is a significant step in this journey. As survivors, embracing your strength, seeking support, and educating yourself about these dynamics can pave the way for healing and a future defined by resilience and autonomy.